Wednesday, March 19, 2014

This & That

_________________________________ Make 'em laugh  ♪ ♪ ♫

OK ! So now that I have your attention
here is an explication of the title

This is my 50th Blog. Yea me !
With a following of 3004 souls
I'm the first one surprised.

I didn't have much to really 
justify a Blog entry so I 
dug into my material and here is 
what I came up with. OK ? 

Here goes.........

_____

Some jokes that I have put up on Facebook
and that some didn't see. 
*** For those who have read them on FB skip ahead...

_________

VARIATION ON A THEME

Here are all the jokes that I had about
"A guy goes in a Bar"

Some are very funny
While others are plain stupid 
or worst - VERY SERIOUS
ENJOY !!!
______

A man walks into a bar
You'd think he would've seen it
______

Horse walks into a bar
Bartender says "why the long face ?"
______

A baby seal walks into a club

______

Two whales walk into a bar
The first one says
"Weeeeeooooouuuhhhh"
The next whale says
"Shut up, Steve. You're drunk."
______

A skeleton meanders into a bar
and orders a beer and a mop
______

A grasshopper sits down at the bar.
The bartender says
'hey, I gotta drink named after you'
The grasshopper says
'you have a drink named Anthony ? '
______

A dyslexic man
walks into a bra
______

A three legged dog walks
into a saloon and says
"I'm looking for the man
who shot my paw !!!"
______
An elf, a man, and a wizard
walk into a bar
The hobbit laughs as walks 
under it
______

So a blind man walks into a bar,
a bus stop and a fence.
______

A midget walks into a mini-bar
______

A termite walks into a bar and says
"is the bar tender here ?"
______

Where does a head of lettuce go to get drunk?
A salad bar.
______

Past, Present, and future
walk into a bar....
It was tense.
______

An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, 
restaurant, restaurants, lounge,
tavern, pub, beer, liquor...
______


So a C, an E-flat, and G go into a bar...
The bartender says: 
"Sorry, but we don't serve minors."
So, the E-flat leaves, and the C and the G
have an open fifth between them. 
After a few drinks, the fifth
is diminished: the G is out flat. 
An F comes in and tries to augment
the situation, but is not sharp enough.
A D comes into the bar and heads straight 
for the bathroom saying, 
"Excuse me, I'll just be a second."
An A comes into the bar,
but the bartender is not convinced
that this relative of C is not a minor.
Then the bartender notices a B-flat hiding
at the end of the bar and exclaims: 
"Get out now! You're the seventh minor 
I've found in this bar tonight."
The E-flat, not easily deflated, 
comes back to the bar the next night 
in a 3-piece suit with nicely shined shoes.
The bartender 
(who used to have a nice corporate job 
until his company downsized) says: 
"You're looking sharp tonight, come on in! 
This could be a major development."
This proves to be the case,
as the E-flat takes off 
the suit and stands there au natural. 
Eventually, the C sobers up
and realizes in horror
that he's under a rest.
The C is brought to trial,
is found guilty of contributing 
to the diminution of a minor,
and is sentenced to
10 years of DS without Coda
at an upscale correctional facility.
On appeal, however, the C is found 
innocent of any wrongdoing,
even accidental and that all accusations
to the contrary are baseless. 
The bartender decides,
however, that since he's only had 
tenor so patrons, 
the soprano out in the bathroom,
and everything has become alto
much treble,
he needs a rest
and closes the bar.

______


Here I'll give you 3 jokes
two short and a long one...
1) Joke 
2) Joke 
3) Joooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooke
______

A realization for Sylvie. Kind of funny !


Looked outside this afternoon and was appalled to see how there was so much pollution that it was obscuring the mountains on the other side of the valley. When I said this to the guys in the office, Raman Kazhamiakin immediately suggested that, rather than pollution, it was just water vapor from the melting snow, what with the heat and the sun we've been having.

Doh!
Started telling this story to Andre Marcil, and he immediately said, yeah, melting snow. Then he laughed at me and called me a city girl. Hey, I'm Ms. Suburbia to you, bud!

Andre Marcil replied :  And the trophy for the Biggest Face Palm in History goes to...........
______

One in every three people
cheats in their relationships
I'm left wondering ?!?!?!?
Is it my wife or my girl-
friend that is cheating me ?
______

I cannot believe that this exist and if it does, is it an iPoop ???
______

 Next BET I'll wager this !!!
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So to finish this, newest Blog, I would like 
to tell you that we are doing fine.
The temperature were really warm 
for February and the start of March.
But now, at this date is kind of cool
in the morning and at night because 
of all the snow on the Mountains melting. 
So, it's chilling the air. 
We started heating the house again
because it can get really chilly. 
If I'm cold it says a lot.

But Life as we know it is still good
As you can see in these few pictures
taken on the 30th of March 2014
The Fiume (River) at the bottom of
the mountains near our apartment
The Fiume going toward our house
It ends up in a bigger River called
the Adige
The mountain in the back is the South of the Alps
And the fluffy white you see is SNOW
I LOVE TRENTO !!!
This picture was taken just to annoy Sylvie
All the corn of Italy is used to make the Traditional dish ; The POLENTA
There was a festival of Flavors and at a Polish stand they were serving these.
So I took a picture and sent to Sylvie.


The Devil made me do it ! For Science !!!
Just for good measure...
These are actually what the city is doing since the start of
Spring. Which is the Start of March. Life is so terrible in Italy
This is to hide the ugly site the construction can be.
It was so cute that I took about 10 pictures of
different kids all covered with finger paint.

Why were we never allowed to do this ???
______

I found this and even if old it is the kind of stuff
that you can find while skiing in the Dolomites
Musica nera su sfondo bianco! 
Di cosa si tratta? 
Scopritelo cliccando qui ?
______

And this picture is of the people 
of my Italian classes.
They have become, all of them
very good friends.

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 AND - this is worth showing a second time !
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Ciao a tutti e multi bacci

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